So confused

I am confused. No big shocker in that statement I suppose. I have been thinking of my options as far as this divorce goes. I had the idea of doing this seperation on our own. It would cost next to nothing and we could at least get the legal seperation part started. It's been almost a year since I have lived with the ex. I had found a few places that I could get the paperwork done at for under $100. Since me and my ex have pretty much already split the assets and have a decent groundwork for child support and visitation. It just makes sense to go the cheap way for the seperation part of this.

I can then pay the money to my attorney for the actual divorce. She keeps telling me that she is not going to admit adultery. I say she needs to. That way we can get divorced right away. She can get on with her life and I can get on with mine.

Now comes a twist. I called the ex the other day and asked when our son is having parent/teacher conferences. She said none were planned as of now but would let me know. She then alos let me in on the secret of her serving me papers. Seems that she is on the same page as I am and was going to blindside me. I asked her to talk with me and we could come up with some groundwork for her to go to whoever she is going to. This way we don't waste time and I won't sign off on something I don't agree with. If we can communicate and get it good to go right away then we can be seperated.

I am thinking her plans are to move out of state with the new dude. But She can't as long as I have visitation. I am planning on heading back to the midwest as soon as I can get another job here and make some money. As soon as I do move she can go wherever she likes.

We were supposed to meet the other day but of course she canceled. I am planning on talking with her and the new dude soon. Just so they are both on the same page as I am.

Another goofy thing is that I had asked not to pay child support for a month so i could pay to get some paperwork and get a few things done for this potential new job. She said NO. Now she has changed her tune and said that I could not pay for 2 months if thats what I needed. I wonder what the 180 is all about. Maybe she finally realized that if I get a better job that means more money for her dumb ass. Thats what kills me, I have no idea what my money goes to. I know she goes to the movies and eats out all the time. I am eating ramen noodles and easy mac.

I just can't wait to get back home and enjoy my life again.